Sometimes people ask why in the world Ross and I are so passionate about parenting education. Once in awhile I hear, “oh, that’s interesting. I have a nephew who really needs that!” Or maybe, “my parents did okay with me. I turned out fine.” And we all know what John Lennon said so beautifully: “Love is All You Need”.
So. . . consider this little story:
Three different guys go to a doctor for different issues. The 1st guy tells the doc that he’s almost always constipated; the 2nd guy tells the doc that he has a terrible pain in his heel; and the 3rd guy tells the doc that he’s been coughing for two solid weeks. The doctor said, “Well, I can help every one of you! I’ll remove your appendixes. Last week, I had a patient who felt terrible. I removed his appendix and he felt fine!”
OMG!! Would you trust a doctor like this? What kind of diagnostic procedure did he use?
Plus, he believed one solution would work for every issue.
So when our daughters were little (hollering was totally a throat-killer while the girls quickly turned deaf, and spanking was really not an option), the only solution that felt worthy was
Da da da DAH ! presenting. . .TIME OUT!
I started using time out for anything I considered inappropriate behavior. What a waste THAT was! Oh man, I had thought I could motivate my 3-year-old to change from knocking her sister over on her head to being sweet, cooperative and a loving little sibling (I did, after all, have my degree in education). Whoa! It didn’t take long before it became totally clear that there must be other ways to help with behavioral issues. Time out is a loser.
It’s NEVER a one-size-fits-all.
Plus, what the heck were we doomed for when the girls got to be teenagers? (that’s when TIME OUT turns into “YOU’RE GROUNDED”) Can’t wait. . .
If we don’t learn some real tools here, we will be in deep doo-doo. I can sing that Beatles’ song like a maniac because I truly do love my kids, but the real truth here is that they arrived into this world with no Owner’s Manual.
But, the awesome thing in all this is that YOU have found Results Parenting. Very soon you will learn more about all the amazing – and highly effective – skills that we can teach you to help create the kind of family that I know you really are wanting: I KNOW you want those kids to learn to cooperate, be responsible, feel great about themselves, handle peer pressure, and learn what it takes to create close and loving relationships.
And to raise them without punishment or being permissive. (Really).
Here’s an action step for you:
Every day for one week look for ONE thing that is truly awesome about your son or daughter, and write it down. Share it with them if you feel so moved. But for right now, it might be a challenge observing only ONE thing, because once you begin looking for what you appreciate, you’ll discover many more. (yep, this simple action has magic!)
If this was valuable to you please pass it along to a friend. You can direct them to our site at www.resultsparenting.com and encourage them to sign up so they can start receiving the same valuable information that you are.
p.s. Keep watching and reading…Results Parenting will have some very exciting news to share soon!